His father was there, on the plain of gray sand. In his hand was a whip. He charged Val, the whip fell heavily on Vallendel's chest, biting deep into his flesh as blood appeared on his pale skin. But Val felt no pain, only numbness, he was cold to the hurt his father had caused.

He was walking, were to he hadn't a clue. Ahead of him he saw a slim figure with black hair like his own. Curious he started running, trying to catch up, but the figure sped up as well, though she remained walking. He finally drew near when she vanished, only to reappear a dragonlength ahead. She turned slowly and Val felt a lump form in his throat. "Mother!" he screamed and reached out to her. She smiled sadly and reached out a hand, then faded until she was gone completely. Vallendel ran to the spot she had been and just stood there. He felt that he should cry, knew the tears were coming, yet none ever fell. He was cold, numb to the pain of losing her.

             He was now surrounded, hundreds of people were looking at him, whispering, girls came up and batted their eyelashes at him, fey men made overtures. He refused them all, coldly blocked them out. Then the whispering started, first a buzz then a roar. He clamped his hands over his ears to shut out the sound he screamed and collapsed to his knees. Then it was gone. The numbness was overtaking him, he was turning to ice again. Already he felt cold all over.

So cold, but without pain, without the hurting. Soon, soon there would be nothing, he would no longer feel, he would be ice.

But the emptiness, the loneliness, then the cold even reached that tiny part of his soul.

Something warm wrapped around him, he felt a presence that comforted him and made him feel safe. Something soft brushed his cheek, something so warm and comforting he could have stayed here forever. The coldness receded but never left, he still felt it, but oh the warmth. He sighed and snuggled closer, willing the comfort and safety this presence gave him to last for eternity.

               Whispers, what were they saying? He felt concern, sympathy, worry, those emotions emanated from the people in the room. What happened? Who are they worried about? He moaned and opened his eyes groggily. Relax Vallendel, you are safe. That voice, what did it want? I want nothing, what do you want Vallendel? Val moaned and put a hand to his head. The whispers stopped and he felt someone's warm hand on his arm. Looking up he recognized P'mir, next to him was an unknown woman. P'mir moved away and Val felt another presence in his mind, and strangely, no emotions came from that presence. I am Phaysath youngling, head searchdragon for Falas Weyr.

             Searchdragon? But that meansHe tried to sit up but P'mir restrained him. " Stay where you are young Vallendel, no one will hurt you here. Here? Where am I? Myself and P;mir brought you to the Weyr. You do not belong out in the holds, you are too unstable. Unstable! Im fine! A bit of arrogance came back along with the numbness. No you are not, do not fight us Vallendel, we don't want to hurt you, not ever. But Im fine! You can't take anyone against their will! Let me go! I must be free! You are free youngling, relax, we wont let anything happen to you. You won't? No. Never, you've been through enough.

           He was scared, so terribly scared, the woman nodded and left the room, P'mir sat by him and waited, though for what Val couldn't fathom. He was silent, the bluerider, Val did like the guy, and trusted him, to an extent. "Why P'mir? What am I doing here?" the man sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Well Vallendel, to be truthful, the dragons decided. Myself and the others had no say in the matter. Siyeth bespoke Phaysath who in turn asked advice from the senior Queen. They all agreed and I had to take you, I'm not sure why and I wish I could answer all of your question, but I don't truly know myself." Is that remorse I'm picking up? And guilt? P'mir sighed and his eyes became unfocused. " Now the lump tells me. Vallendel, are you an empath?" Why would he want to know? And what does that have to do with anything? " Yes, to an extent, why?" "Theres your answer, the dragons sensed that and knew you would be right for one of their kind." "Me! I've never even dreamed of becoming a dragonrider! Are you sure they're not mistaken?" P'mir shook his head. " The dragons are never wrong Vallendel, but I won't push you, do you want to stay?" Do I? What else is there for me? Anyone else would jump at the chance. But you arent anyone else, think carefully. Fine, I will if youll leave me alone! He felt the dragon retreat and Val welcomed the feeling for a moment, then wished he had it back. If I impress a dragon, he could push back the nightmares, help me, keep me safe from Them. Maybe I should. He looked into P'mir's expectant eyes and didn't know quite what to say. Yes would do. Welcome back then. He heard the dragon chuckle and couldn't suppress a grin himself. Gods, when was the last time I smiled? "I'll be a candidate P'mir, but I haven't a clue of what I'm supposed to do."